How Do We Take On Advice and Actually Use It?
Welcome to the one day at a time podcast where we forget about yesterday. We don't worry about tomorrow. It's what are we going to do today? This all matters because you've only ever had or will ever have the fantastic twenty four hours a day you're about to embark on. Hopefully this episode is going to give you some daily dose of wisdom that you can take action on today to improve your life.
Speaker 1:Remember, all it takes is one day at a time. Good morning everyone. We realised on the weekend I hit the funeral once or twice mind but I still can't sing. Maybe our next challenge after the dance challenge is a singing challenge isn't it? So we can all start singing when we meet up.
Speaker 1:So we'd all start dancing when we meet up and then we'd all start singing like Tom Jones. But today's voice note is all about how does or how do we keep digesting advice and use it, basically. Something I've been thinking about a lot actually because I've got a huge input of information that I'm doing, reading all of you all of your stories, success stories, stuff like that. Thinking, like, how do we get this across to being something that we actually do every day? I mean how do we actually take this wisdom and adopt it on a day to day basis right?
Speaker 1:And there's this thing called first principle thinking. So every time it comes to a decision in a day and the stoics talk about this as well it's about that time between the kind of emotion or the impulse or whatever happens and then the decision. That time between there, we wanna make that as long as possible. Right? In a sense, we wanna make it usually, it's like zero point zero zero one seconds for people because they can't control or hold on or as the saying is have a cool head and be very calm and cautious in those scenarios.
Speaker 1:People typically don't have that. Once we open that time frame up so we can actually stop and apply a first principle, we can then start thinking, right. Let me let me slide in a few of the words of wisdom that I wanna live by. And then after I read that and think about it, then I make the decision based on that. So that's what we're gonna talk about today.
Speaker 1:So you wanna basically take five, six or seven of these kind of principles or or maxims of ways living. You wanna write them out and you basically like, have a whiteboard in front of me. I write them in a whiteboard in front of me, so I see them every day. I basically memorize them. And then they get ingrained in me.
Speaker 1:And basically after a few months, I'll be like, well, like living that. And then some of them not work and I flip them out. And then, know, I keep going until I'm gonna have my ultimate seven in a way, but you need to come up with your own ones. I'm gonna give you some of mine that I've got currently and this is your task for today. So I'll give you start thinking about what words of wisdom have you go through your journals, go through your messages and stuff what really struck with you from all the Q and A's we've done all the stuff has helped you live a better life.
Speaker 1:Right? And if you can memorize them, and we can adopt some stoic principles and having a cool head and being able to withhold judgment in a situation, give ourselves a few seconds of a think, right, let's let's adopt. Let's have a look what that does. Okay. I make this decision your life will infinitely get better.
Speaker 1:So you're the six of mine okay the first thing I'll think about before I when I'm reading stuff now is Socrates right said the only true wisdom is no is know when you know nothing. Okay? So I follow this one, and I think it's really been helpful for me recently as well because I'm reading things online and you like you you assume straight away that you know or you assume it's like you dismiss it, you have to think, look, I don't know anything. Empty cup mindset, you Like remember we read Bee Water My Friend by Seanan Lee, Bruce Lee, empty cup mindset. If you think you already know, you can't learn anything.
Speaker 1:Okay? I think Epictetus even says that. So this is like an old thing. This has been happening for them for a long time, long time. So that's a good principle to have.
Speaker 1:So every time you go into something you know nothing, I'm open to seeing what it says and then that gives you a bit more space to think about it. Second one was really when when Don Robinson was talking about Socrates and about health and fitness and he said Socrates's quote is hunger is the best relish. Okay, the Yahiruni that we enjoy our food more when we're hungry and spoil our appetites when we overindulge. And that's not just a food thing that applies to everything in life. If you drink too much, if you party too much, if you sit in the sun too much, it just it just ruins it.
Speaker 1:So moderation is the answer here. But hunger is the best relish. And I've been a massive overeater. Ask anyone. I can eat like, I don't know.
Speaker 1:I'm a hip like a hippo basically. I can eat insane amounts. I've definitely improved over the last year or two where I've actually you know I'm full and stopped. It's quite hard because I'm gonna keep going. But I managed to do it and I've given that time.
Speaker 1:Hunger is the best relish you know like the next meal if I'm a bit hungry I'll enjoy it more and I need to be able to stop in the moderation at the other side and don't overeat till I hate it. I'm sweating, sweating, overeating so much you're sweating in pain after it. You're paralyzing yourself. What are you doing? Literally it's nuts.
Speaker 1:Think about how many times we've that we've eaten so much we've literally paralyzed ourselves. If someone came and attacked me, I've like made attack me I can't do anything I can't move. I'll sweat and I'll sweat and die. My third one is win through your actions never through argument. Know there's no doubt that this is tough when we live in a COVID world because you have to there's a lot of stuff through online.
Speaker 1:Have to speak, and your actions are basically kind of through your your writing and putting out on there. And you can you can assume that's like an a verbal argument, But I'd rather work in the shade, work in the shadows like I said yesterday. What we do in the shadows determines who we are. Right? Whatever we do in the shadows, all of us, is what determines the life we have with the people, the person we are.
Speaker 1:And that's definitely true. Right? So I want to win from my actions and actions to be showing not through saying shit. I'll do this I'll do that like I'm not going to spend hours in pointless meetings right I've cut those out don't do meetings, being busy is basically bullshit right being busy busy busy don't care if you're busy what does that result in what's the actions right being busy is in itself is just pointless right it's it's procrastination filling the void with shit just to say you're busy it's not good you need to be winning through your actions and the actions are going to be meaningful right So instead of appearing like a winner, work in silence. That's it.
Speaker 1:That's my motto. I've I've done it anyway, but I'm doubling down on this. I'd love to go off social media tonight. Goodbye. And just work in silence and do it.
Speaker 1:You know? And I think that be a bold action taker in the shadows is something I would rather be when I'm working on doubling down. So I said, win three actions and have two argument. So I'd always come to this before I make decisions or whatever. I'm not always not always you know, when I talk about Welsh independence to people, this is hard to stop because you can't really show through action.
Speaker 1:You have to debate, and I find it difficult, and I'm not winning all all those arguments. Fourth one, you suffer more imagination than reality, Seneca. Guys, science is also backing up that this is not just, oh, you suffer more imagination, that's quite bad. No. It's really bad because your body, your bodily reaction can't tell a difference between a physical danger I e, you know, coming on a way to hit you or you thinking about that happening.
Speaker 1:Right? When you think of stuff happening, like, might get a you know, you think about, like, oh, if I went on and got attacked or whatever, you start getting sweaty, your palms sweaty, all this stuff. Right? That's the body reacting as if it's actually happening okay so we're not just suffering in imagination more than reality we're suffering in imagination and we're manifesting that imagination suffering into actual physical reality in the body and we know the chronic stress over time is horrible and terrible for us, one of the main things we need to focus on. So we really need to get a grip on, how we let our thoughts run away in our mind.
Speaker 1:Right? Don't catastrophize. Don't you know, you need to stop the negative negative feedback loop, and you need to bring rationality to it. You need to work yourself back to reality, and it's a step step by step process. And I'm sure Dean covers it a lot in the mindset stuff, but definitely try to, not catastrophize.
Speaker 1:Fifth thing this is my one of favorite. I know this quote. I say it all the time, but it's it's gonna stay there forever, this one. Everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you, and you can change it. You can influence it.
Speaker 1:Once you learn that, you you'll never be the same again. Steve Jobs. I literally remind myself of this every day. It's baked into my subconscious at the moment. Everything around you, this everything.
Speaker 1:K? Apart from the sun and a few other things, everything in this planet, houses, the roads, the phone, laptop, the Internet, was made up by people. And more often than not, people know smarter. Right? There's obviously geniuses out there, but in general in general, it's just people who've had the guts to go and do, I'm gonna change this.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna do this, that I've ended up doing it. And you can influence it. Right? That's the important thing. You can actually do it.
Speaker 1:You don't
Speaker 2:have to see you have
Speaker 1:to be born and then just be pushed into this box and be like, here's your box. Off you go. This is life. That's not life. That's literally what is you know quote unquote real for you now in this year of decade and time.
Speaker 1:You go back through hundreds of years it's been different all the time it's been changing it's been moving and that's because of people and more often not a small group of people have managed to make the biggest changes. What's that quote? I remember as far as I said the other other week, it's often one or two people, you know, people think only a few people can't change your world one or two people can't change your world well it's often the only people that actually have done it and started off with that so remember that Steve Jobs sneaking your way in once again I hope you're looking down at me when I see you in heaven you better give me the biggest what's it called? Manshake of the world. Okay.
Speaker 1:And the sixth one. This is a new one I've introduced because I need to keep reminding myself of it even though I know the benefits inside out and the science. But walking is human's best medicine. Hippocrates. Okay?
Speaker 1:So anytime I feel shitty in my mind, walking is the best medicine. Walking is the best medicine. So I try and do that now. I feel shit. What am I doing?
Speaker 1:I never okay. Let me get let me give myself a cool head here. But have I gone for a walk? No. Okay.
Speaker 1:Go for a walk. Don't mess about. Don't think, oh, well, what can I do? Oh, if I go to gym, feel better. If I go for a walk, comfortably walk.
Speaker 1:If you feel like you're trapped in the day and you're working, you feel sluggish and horrible and you haven't done your walk, go and do your walk. There's no need to overanalyze that. You're always gonna feel better even in the rain. Go for a walk sometimes without any headphones on sometimes with hot chocolate on. What a song, hot chocolate get them on, everybody's a winner right, so you know, one other one, start with a kiss all of these ones get them on, go for a walk and you know the benefits of walking I've gone over them and it'll it'll take another ten minutes of the voice not to go over them.
Speaker 1:But those are the six I'm trying to live by now and I'm trying to memorize them. Right? And this is why I want you to start doing now. If you don't got six, can you pick some today? Pick a few things and start.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna memorize these. I'm gonna stick them in front of me every day to memorize them. And then every time I have a decision to make in the day, I'm gonna look at them and see which one does this work? Is it okay. Let's have a look.
Speaker 1:And you kind of have first principle thinking. Does that make sense? Because otherwise, if you're not memorizing these things to to pull out in the moments where you don't have access to a book or your note in front of you, how are you gonna use this wisdom? You need it to be in your mind, memorized, you just do. But you can only memorize so much.
Speaker 1:And we try and go back and forth and we keep going. We throw away the ones that don't kind of work, bring in the ones that do and we keep revolving through our lives and we collect them. These little cards of wisdom which one should I use today happy days. So please do overthink right have a think and let me know what yours are so comment below I'd love to know where they are and see what ones work best. And I think one the many of you should try and do is obviously we so what's in our control?
Speaker 1:What is in our control? Right? That's stoic philosophy, that classic only focus on what you can control, and that's your own voluntary actions. That's your own attitude towards things. Right?
Speaker 1:If you live by that, you can always turn a day around, basically. Like, all this shit happens all day. Well, you know what? I can only control what I can control, and I get on with it. And I will bypass.
Speaker 1:That'll save you hours a week of just going back and forth. Oh, I hate it. Hate life is all sucks. It's not fair. No.
Speaker 1:It's not. What are we gonna do about it? What are we gonna do about it? That's the end. That's it.
Speaker 1:What are gonna do about it? It's the only real thing you you to know. You need to you need to go at. And there's I just wanna finish with a few ones I think that are bad. You only live once, I think, isn't really a good one in a sense that, of course, we only live once, and I get the the sentiment, like, you're like, oh, you're gonna go to Sky, you only live once, go on.
Speaker 1:But people often use this one in the in the bad sense where you're like, it's the 1AM, you go work tomorrow, they're like, oh, I have another Guan, have booze, I still get wrecked. You only live once, mate. Yeah. Get it, but I mean, will will me get in wrecked for another two hours? Can I improve my day tomorrow, Tom?
Speaker 1:No. It's not. And if I ended them like, no. Will I be will I have enjoyed 99.9% of my night? Yes.
Speaker 1:So people often use out of context. It's obviously it can be sometimes what I think universally used. And then anything to do with entitlement. Okay? People think they're entitled to being happy, entitled to any kind of job, entitled to this and that.
Speaker 1:No one is entitled if you think you've got if you're entitled to anything, think it's a slippery slope, and it reinforces kind of the bad habits, and it's it's a terrible way to live. So if you think you're not entitled to anything, I think it's a it's a good way to live. And it's a good mindset to have because you get on with doing what you can do and back to where you can only do what's under your control. And I think that when you get rid the entitlement, you just go back. What what can I do What can I do in this moment?
Speaker 1:Because it's the only time we ever have to do action. You can say I'll do it next week tomorrow. I don't know if you get it yet, but the present moment right now listening to this voice note, the only time you'll ever have. Everything else is gone. So the past is gone, the future doesn't exist.
Speaker 1:The only time you'll ever have is right now and you'll never have more time because it's the same twenty four hours every time. Right? Does that make sense? You'll never have more time so you need to do it now you need to if you're just thinking busy yes I get it and I really admire people who've got kids and dogs and all this stuff but they have we have to find a way do you mean we just do and if we we we we will find a way somehow. This this trial and error, we can do we can do it.
Speaker 1:We can find a way. And we gotta we gotta be very we gotta plan. We gotta plan wisely, and, hopefully, we can take things one day at a time then to take away all of the stress of thinking long term. We focus on the one day at a time principle with, obviously, of course, plans put in motion to that we do this today will happen in the future. And that's how we live it.
Speaker 1:We make the most of every moment. So, hopefully, you're having a good time listening to this voice and all on a nice walk. It is humid. Hopefully, it's not raining now. Get on with your day.
Speaker 1:Enjoy it. Enjoy the moment of the day. Simple as summer. It's July. Summer '20 '20 '1.
Speaker 1:Lockdown's gone in England. Is that good or bad? We don't know. But enjoy the freedom you do have and obviously be careful, but enjoy these walks as well. Walks in the sun.
Speaker 1:Can't be beaten. Can't be beaten. But I'm gonna sign off with some Fleetwood Mac now.
Speaker 2:So have a
Speaker 1:good day everyone. I'll speak to you tomorrow. And that's it. Thank you for listening to the one day at a time podcast with your host, Scott Fleer. Hopefully, you understood something I said.
Speaker 1:I hope that some wisdom kind of distilled through into your mind, and I want you to now action it today. I don't want you to think about tomorrow. I don't want you to think about yesterday. I don't want you to think about leaving a review on this podcast. I don't want you to think about going to another website.
Speaker 1:What I want you to do is as soon as this podcast ends, you will take action and make the most of today. Ground yourself today. Follow the one day at a time philosophy and your life will change.
