How to Find Out Your Weaknesses
Welcome to the one day at a time podcast with your host and the future leader of The Republic Of Wales, Svalfuyler. Now this might be the only podcast in the world where you actually have to reduce the speed instead of increasing it. However, what I wanna get over to you is that the past is gone. The future doesn't exist. So if you wanna make the most of your life, you've gotta make the most of these moments every single day.
Speaker 1:And this podcast is gonna help you live a healthier, more fulfilled life, hopefully, giving you some wisdom to take away every single day. So I'm gonna shut up now so you can get on with listening to the next episode. Good morning, today's the day we got our dance session with the Queen theme So 8AM guys, the link is in the Facebook group if you're in the turtle members group. We've got a session, a taster session before we start our dance challenge on the August 9. So if you're ready a total member, it's free for you.
Speaker 1:If not, £59, 1 off payment, eight weeks access to the macros app, happy days. But on top of today, it's book club last night, really good one. What I love about that one is we're reading a book called a school of life by Alain de Bretonne. And it's basically a book that goes through different phases, like there's a lot of different sections and we're gonna work through them. So we've gone on a section yesterday, we thought let's see what we think about love, self help, fear, confidence, all this stuff.
Speaker 1:And then let's see how the book actually helps us overcome our kind of I wouldn't say negative things about them, but understanding how it can help us. So the first thing we spoke about really was that we spoke about love and I'm not sure it's gonna be any help in this voice or not because it just is love a skill or is it something that isn't automatic but there's a beautiful quote that love is a cup of tea in the morning. So something you got to work on and it's got to be consistent I would say but when it goes on to self help, self help is it the only form of help really like you know Vanessa G with an amazing quote, you can walk with someone but you can't drag them right, you can't. You see those videos of dogs, a funny video of dogs and the owner's trying to drag a dog and he's just there like sitting back in the lead, he's not moving, you can't drag it. It could only come if it wants to come.
Speaker 1:So that's the thing we got to understand is like the only way we're gonna gonna help ourselves if we're open to help. And if you're always pushing people away, if you're always shunning things, if you always got the negativity in your mind of everything new that comes in your path, you're never gonna be able to help yourself because everything comes in your form, you're pushing it away. So we have to understand that we've gotta be open. We gotta be open for help. And then we gotta and we are we have take action, basically.
Speaker 1:We have to take action, and that's when self that's why it says self help is really the only only form of help we got. We look at fear. Right? We talk about fear. What is the fear of starting a fitness journey stuff?
Speaker 1:It's the fear, look, we're we're gonna fail. We're gonna look stupid. The fear is we're scared we might actually be this person. We might actually be this person that's overweight or obese or whatever we think of ourselves. We're like, no.
Speaker 1:I'm this. This is me. It's not you. No. It's not you.
Speaker 1:I we we it's scary because change change going from a position of certainty to uncertainty that's when fear creeps in. So it the certainty is I'll just sit here and eat, I can't change and that's the certainty and it's comforting. Certainty and sit here I'm just going to eat or I like comfort foods I'm not going to change I never will change anyway. Certainty feels good. Uncertainty is when we go right we'll go to the gym for the first time well this is not me and the fear comes in but the thing is that when you run away from fear, when you run away from it gets worse, gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger it's kind of like anxiety stuff if you run away from it it's not gonna help.
Speaker 1:What is even fear? Fear is always like a past thing looking back ask me no and this is gonna change. Fear is something that like you have to accept right you accept fear because it's just fear is fear in a sense fear is fear but you have to just accept it right It's not gonna go away. It's not it's it's it's not there to look, I'm scared. Let's just accept the fact that there is fear in change, and it will dissolve basically in a sense.
Speaker 1:And you know, you like, Christina was talking about how she was scared to go running, it was fear. But then when you accept it and you just go running, you get better. Competence over time helps with confidence is another quote from the book Club Amazing. Competence over time equals confidence. And I think that helps us accept the fear and then actually that we realise the fear was in our power to dissolve all along, that it was something we just completely made up in our own minds.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, you need you will feel confident when you feel competent. So ask for help. If you need help in the technique Tuesdays with Ryan to help with forms you know you're doing things right that's going to help with your confidence. The macros up helping asking Doctor P on Tuesdays on coming up on the nutrition stuff, are you in the right track, are you doing the right thing that'll give you confidence knowing that someone of his caliber or team said yes you're doing well you're doing the right thing good that's going to give confidence. Right, All these little things build up so we want to build the confidence up okay and then we can get over this fear.
Speaker 1:We talk about then rituals. So you know the Japanese tea ritual and rituals are like what I would say are beautified habits And they would just make thing and rituals are there, and he says in the book to reinforce the things we often overlook, the easy basic stuff that remind us to bring us back down to reality and essentially. And we need to probably have, you know, the rituals of, you know, Alice talked about apparently in one of the Zooms we did about you know the the skincare routine before bed the nighttime cleanse that's like a ritual yeah. Think of do you have any rituals? Think of some.
Speaker 1:Would you like to build some? Maybe the rituals is the morning walk, you put your shoes on, you get your coffee, you go on a walk, you go to the same bench, you sit down, you'll think to yourself for five, ten minutes and you're looking at nature. It could be a ritual, a little morning ritual. I think it's good to have these things. Very important actually.
Speaker 1:And, what else do we speak about? So we have the fear, and he talks about, right, so the sane insanes. Like, none of us are ever gonna be perfect. Right? We know that.
Speaker 1:We're never gonna be perfect. We have to accept that now. But he talks about the sane ins the sane sane insanity, honest, accurate grasp at what's not right with us. Right? So we we do our we can be dry.
Speaker 1:We can be funny. We can laugh at the tragedy of being a human being because guess what? We wanna have the best body in the world, but we also wanna eat all the amazing pizza stuff at the same time. We wanna we wanna live. We wanna have millions and millions of pounds in the bank, but we don't wanna work like them like they do twenty hour days and all that stuff.
Speaker 1:I know some are automatically with millions inheritance, but like I say, self made. We wanna fall in love and have the best relationship in the world, but yet we won't ever let our guard down and let people in. We're always in we're always a contradiction. That's fine. That's humans.
Speaker 1:Human beings. That's what we are. Accept it. Right? Accept that.
Speaker 1:And we can move on, basically. So we can move on from the fact that, like, that that's what we're gonna be like, but we need to then look at what our weaknesses are. We spoke about that. Steve, amazing bits about, you know, what he really is Steve's weaknesses. You know, Steve Steve's story got, like, going a job, started his own business, got few things going on, business with his wife, you know, on paper, like, amazing.
Speaker 1:All of sudden, feels like, of it's amazing. It was amazing he's done it. It's like, what's really pulling him back? You know, you have to look at your weaknesses, and he's like, my weakness is consistency, following through finishing tasks. There's no point starting stuff if you're never gonna finish.
Speaker 1:You have to be able to finish stuff. It's better to be a finisher, right, than someone who starts on the things. So like, right, if that's my weakness and I'm, you know, that's it. I'm a tragic man. I'm starting things all the time and I can't finish it.
Speaker 1:Laugh for yourself, right, okay. I'm gonna finish something now. I'm gonna try something different this time. I'm gonna try something different working it. And that's when you look at, you know, pulling away those stumbling blocks away from your life and then actually you get towards your goal.
Speaker 1:So what are your weaknesses? You can go on 16 and look at your weaknesses and it'll tell you, and it might be accurate, it might not, but it might give you an idea. Being aware of your weaknesses is a great starting point. However, that's not really gonna fix things, but being aware is a good place to be. And I think if we can, so we have to look at how bad the weaknesses are.
Speaker 1:I think some of the low hanging fruits in life instead of and Bruce Lee talks about this as well, instead of being it's not the addition, it's the subtraction. You sub you addition via subtraction. Right? He talks about that. Where you might look at your life and you go, what am I missing?
Speaker 1:What do I need to add? Don't actually, you don't need to add anything else. You need to look at your life and go right what am I am I getting my own way at? What can I remove that's gonna then add to my life? You're making it like I'm gonna remove talk doing loads of new stuff all the time and just finish things right?
Speaker 1:What is it in your life that you're that's in the way? What are you getting your own way at right? And I think that's where, your thoughts should be today. I know it's Friday, a bit deep Friday, I don't know. But I think something to something something really think about, and it's something I like it talks about the book is about psychotherapy talks about the therapist is the only person you're really ever gonna open up to ever ever fully and be fully vulnerable with, and they just listen.
Speaker 1:We we don't really do it with our friends. We we can't because they won't listen all along. Our family, we don't. Other people, and we have to hold back. And I think if anyone is thinking of, you know, therapy and stuff like that, not even like, oh, you're messed up.
Speaker 1:You're gonna therapy. No. No. You how amazing is if every person in this world was able to fully, fully open up to someone and really, like, let go and see what what is in the deep, dark connections of those brain from the past? What really is holding us back?
Speaker 1:What what is it? Where these weaknesses come in? And, really that introspection. Sometimes it's hard to do it on our own, but, you know, it it it is something to start with. But I think a lot of us would like would be far better off spending some time thinking about it because some of us can't even spend five minutes alone, no real mind.
Speaker 1:Can't do it. Gotta go out. Gotta drink. Gotta do this. Gotta go down.
Speaker 1:Can't do it. Can't start. Can't do it. Four more kicks in. No.
Speaker 1:No. It's the uncomfortable. The being so uncomfortable. Fear again coming in. It's so uncomfortable of not being able to just sit on your own thoughts.
Speaker 1:So that's my task for you all. Do the 16personalities.com test. Think look at your strengths, at your weaknesses, are they accurate, anything resonate, look at the weaknesses and go do know I'm gonna try and work in these. Ask yourself have you really opened up and been vulnerable to anyone no therapy cost money and stuff like that but even if you've got no problems in your life you know everything's going swimmingly well might just be worth going and having a chat and seeing what happens. And I'll leave you with that guys.
Speaker 1:And, all of you gotta go to therapy basically. But it's always stigmatized isn't it? Like stigma to us. It doesn't need to be. It doesn't need to be.
Speaker 1:It doesn't need to be. We should see it as the gym, the mind gym. Right? We go to the gym, throw a body training, we go there for the mind. And I think that that's important.
Speaker 1:But it's Friday, obviously, the weekend is here, but we don't think about the weekend after week because it's one day at a so we think of today. So today's Friday, right we made up Friday whatever today the hours we've got today what we're gonna do with it. Think about this for a second right there's a lot of you now who are like worried about gotta do this by thirty this by forty five this by fifty or like whatever when you're 18 you want to have this by twenty five. So we're always worried about because we've created time obviously which is amazing because if we didn't have time like how would the world work it'd be crumbling but it would still work we wouldn't have achieved what we have as human beings. But imagine I put you on an island now and you didn't know your name, right, you didn't know your age, you didn't have a clock, right, and to put you on an island, nice little house, however, a lot of your anxieties would have melt away because there's no pressure for you to do something by the future that we're always thinking we got this promotion.
Speaker 1:We got to have a family, got have a kid, we got to be married. Always this pressure to be something in the future by x age. But if you didn't have the understanding that that even existed, how can you stress about it? You can't. Can you?
Speaker 1:Because it's it's not even in your mind to think about, oh, what am gonna do tomorrow? You don't even think about tomorrow. You're just looking you're you're just living in the now on that on that island chopping some wood. So if we know that's the truth that if we remove the constructs that have been created by other human beings over time right we can try and remove them and not have them condition us so much. So we can try and think right so obviously I would know age unless someone was doing time and I wouldn't know that I was 30 and I wouldn't know that this is meant to be something here and it's meant to be this that here if I didn't know that and that's all made up by humans.
Speaker 1:So I can kind of see that's like a game I don't wanna play in, and you can refuse to play the game. You can refuse. Obviously, good because you're like, well, females have you know, we we obviously, it's important to know, like, well, by the age of 50, 60, whatever menopause, we know the things that come in, obviously. But I don't think in general, it's a good thing always to think about doing something all the time by x time and now that breeds fear and we keep getting scared every day we have to do this by x instead of just living today. That's really my long winded way of saying enjoy your day today, just enjoy it, don't think of tomorrow, mister tomorrow he's knocking on the door, ta da boy you're not coming in.
Speaker 1:Mister y days coming up behind you now running behind you trying to make you remember the past stuff. Hey. Hey. Hey, you're mister Y Day bro shut up, I don't want you, don't want your nonsense. I'm going today, today only so enjoy your day, enjoy your Friday and I'll see you on Monday.
Speaker 1:And that is it for today's episode. So hopefully, you took something away from it. If you didn't, here's what we need to take away. Stop wasting time on social media. Stop wasting time gossiping.
Speaker 1:You've only got a day to live. Today's the only day you ever have. So if there's anything to take away from this podcast, even if you can't understand the word I say, even if you didn't resonate with the wisdom I try to deliver, this is a reminder of you daily to live one day at a time. Give your moments meaning today and don't be fooled by thinking you've got unlimited amount of days. But if you can make the most of today, I'm telling you, you'll have a fulfilled life.
Speaker 1:So enjoy your day and hopefully I'll see you back tomorrow.
