We want what we can't have
Hey. Good morning, guys. For anyone in Book Club last night, are you still alive? We went on for an extra hour or so and, yeah, entirely. It was a deep one, guys.
Speaker 1:I'm not gonna say the same stuff now. It's a it's a two way conversation, But always interested to go deeper on these conversations. That's what I love about it. I love talking about the stuff that matters, the deep stuff, not the superficial stuff at the top, the deep stuff. Just don't get a chance to speak of these things to other people.
Speaker 1:Do you? Do your friends wanna talk about it? Nah. Family members? Nah.
Speaker 1:So who is there to talk about? Nobody. And you go through life and you go, I've literally spoke about gossip all my life with my friends. I literally spoke about how much beers the boys can drink all my life. I've literally spoken about how much money someone's making.
Speaker 1:I've literally only spoke about what other people, successful people are doing. Oh, oh my god. No, I refuse to live our life. I'm not doing it. Guys, I'm not doing it.
Speaker 1:That's what I'm saying. So if you wanna join me in these chats, let me know. But I hope the challenge is going well. Like, we're in we're into nearly finishing week six. Again, reminder, progress by now, you would have seen a ton of progress.
Speaker 1:And I'm not talking about fat loss. I'm talking about mindset wise. And that's the main thing. That's the main gist. If you can finish this ten week octagon challenge, read a few books, learn build some new habits, become aware of your own actions.
Speaker 1:In that awareness each day of your own actions, you learn more about yourself than anyone can tell you. I could tell you all the studies in the world, but the best thing for you to do is to look at your own behavior without judgment. Right? Just observe your behavior every day without judging it, changing it, whatever. Just look at it, and then you can see where you went wrong to start with.
Speaker 1:If you still are thinking, my I haven't dropped any weight. I'm still overeating. I'm still secret eating. And you go, no. I'm not secret eating, Scott.
Speaker 1:I swear down. And I say to you, for few days, just track exactly everything. Weigh every single thing out and track every single thing you eat. And this goes for the weekend as well and make the most of it. And don't don't judge yourself.
Speaker 1:Just observe, and you'll find out. You'll see the fact. Because we're always trying to think that as this, in the observe in the observing of the days in your behavior, you see the fact of where you go wrong in terms of the the intakes, calories, and you then be able to make changes. So remember that if you feel like you strain away, take it back to the basics. I will track today and I'll be 100% honest.
Speaker 1:And in that honesty, I'm not gonna hate myself, judge myself, condemn myself. I'm just gonna see it, accept it, and I'll know what to do next. It's as simple as that. Okay. It is as simple as that.
Speaker 1:In our little fourteen day challenge of macros, I ask people to and I want you all to do it today as well is with your macros, right, I want you today to eat your favorite snack today and fit it into your macros, whether that's a galaxy bar, dairy milk, if it's a Oreo sandwich ice cream or a Mars ice cream or a Welsh cake, whatever it is, eat it today, put in your macros, and don't judge it. Don't hate yourself for it. Just let it go. Eat it and let it go. That's it.
Speaker 1:Right? Ask people to do it. Day four this free challenge from just to get them into macros, right, using the app saying, can't believe it. They loved it. First time they did it and actually they realized they didn't even want to eat as much of it.
Speaker 1:Isn't that isn't that interesting? When we when we put things off list restricted, we want what we can't have, and then we keep wanting to have what we can't have. But when we can have anything when we can have anything, the pull from those restricted things disappears, doesn't it? Right? So we need to see that.
Speaker 1:We need to unlock ourselves in this jail we create ourselves in. You know, in Portugal, they decriminalize drugs. Know, problems were way down. People going to jail for drug stuff went down from forty to fifteen percent. Massive change, know.
Speaker 1:I think there's a lot to be said about just complete openness, complete, you know, do whatever you want. And then in that awareness stillness and you can do anything you want, then actually do what you really want to be doing, as opposed to being pulled by these desires you don't want to have. You know, that thing about mimetic desire, we want what other people want. Right? We want what we can't have.
Speaker 1:And when we just live our lives based off desires being created by other people or just like false thoughts and stuff, we're in for a world of pain, aren't we? We're in for a big world of pain. I don't think it's a good way to live. So in that front, that's the task for you guys today is to just like eat your favorite snack and just track it in your macros and go back to basics guys. Just make sure we're focusing basics.
Speaker 1:It's deload week if you're on track time wise, but go for a walkie steps in. Yeah. Read the book Stoicism book. No. It's not what happens to us, it's our opinion of what happens to us that causes the disturbances in the mind.
Speaker 1:Right? Epictetus. That's what triggered the the the r g e b r e b t and cognitive behavioral therapy, all this stuff from that observation two thousand years ago, how true is it? We want no one to accept it. It's your opinion about things that's the problem, not the thing itself.
Speaker 1:The thing itself isn't actually a problem. You know? The number on the scales isn't a problem in itself. It's the story and thought you have and the opinion of that number's a problem. Being you know, you might say, for example, you might feel you're overweight now.
Speaker 1:Being overweight right now isn't exactly a problem. Right? But your opinion of it is the problem. You think that it's the worst thing ever to happen is bad. But actually, look at it.
Speaker 1:Well, it's how it is. The the world is built around convenience and stuff, and there's no wonder a lot of people are over consuming calories. Fine. It's fine. We chip away slowly one day at a time.
Speaker 1:It's the only way it's been proven to work for your health. All your dieting is absolutely shocking for your health. I mean it's unbelievably bad. You look at the fatty liver increase, cardiovascular disease increase risk, you know, all this stuff. The swing in weight is the problem, the body going from, you know, 30 pounds down 30 pounds away, back up 40 pounds, all this crazy stuff happening, you're on the right path, taking it one day at a time chipping away, You're definitely doing the right thing.
Speaker 1:If the only thing that can you know help you lose weight and make sure you're not having these negative health consequences at the same time. Yeah. So our opinion on that, if it's that, there is no disturbance in the fact that our results are slower. Because our opinion on it is that it's the right thing to do. But if your opinion is that you wanted to be faster and if it's not at a certain rate, which is means it's not working, you are going to be disturbed by taking it slowly.
Speaker 1:And that's exactly what people fall into the trap of, their opinion on it. I think that's the most freeing thing about stoicism. It's like, look, what can I control? My voluntary actions. That's absolutely it.
Speaker 1:That's the only thing I can control. Like, I can line up the best shot on a football pitch. I can get my best togs on, boots. I can get my best outfit on. I can wait for the wind to stop.
Speaker 1:I can make sure that I'm feeling the perfect and make sure I'm in the right stance, I could run up and kick a ball to the perfect to perfection in my end. And then out of nowhere, a rocket comes and blows the ball up and down, whatever. Or something, you know, a bird flies out, knocks the ball, and doesn't go in. You know, I did my best. I did everything right.
Speaker 1:And that's enough. That is it. I did my best. That is it. End.
Speaker 1:I'm not looking at the end result. That's freeing. You know? Like, you think of this in, relationships. Right?
Speaker 1:You just be yourself. You do your best day to day. You just be yourself. You do the good of just being yourself. What you do is right.
Speaker 1:Right? There's no games. There's no playing. You're doing this for that. And you're doing this for that at game end goal.
Speaker 1:You're doing that for that. You don't have to perceive as this. You're acting a certain way to get a certain, you know, view on you. You just do, you just be yourself and do what you think is the right good thing based off obviously good value judgments. And that's enough.
Speaker 1:And if you get rejected, then that's it. There is no disturbance there because you just the doing, being yourself is what is the good thing. Am I am I making sense? Same with with the jobs. Obviously, we'd love if you're looking for a job, you'd love to get a job and it you know?
Speaker 1:But if you do your best, you be you. That's enough. You get declined outside your control. You were thinking, well, Scott, you know, easier said than done, mate. It is easier said than done.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying this is an easy process to achieve. I'm not saying that's an easy way to go about living, but it's a way that massively reduces disturbances, massively reduces anxiety about stuff, massively reduces worry, and puts a lot more power back in your hands. It puts the power back in your hands, the only power you've ever had. You've been dissipating this power you've had into things that are outside your control. And when it comes to the things inside your control, which is evolved reaction, you've got no power left.
Speaker 1:You've given it away to stuff that's not ever gonna work. You're trying to change the impossible and then wearing yourself over the mat. And actually if you just unified the power you have into the only thing you can do in your control, that's life changing, isn't it? And just another note on just to back up exactly that you're doing the right thing in terms of macros versus you know, clean eating and all this like healthy eating people think. Studies have shown that especially for women, if you follow a macro based approach, and you chocolates and the nice things and you know you have your donut there and the pizza here, you actually consume more micronutrients than if someone was eating a clean diet we call you know the basic lean, the veggies only, the chickens.
Speaker 1:The variety causes more antagonism, more added vitamins and minerals through these days. So actually, not only is the macros based approach the only one really that is unlimited, unrestricted, is enjoyable. It's actually micronutrient wise better than the clean eating crowd. So you're on the right path guys. I just want to reinforce it at this part of the challenge.
Speaker 1:You're on the right path. You need to keep going. I put a smile on your face today and use this voice note as a prompt to track your macros right now if you haven't been doing it for a while. Put your exercise in. Do your daily diary.
Speaker 1:Whatever it is you need doing, just do it right now as soon as this podcast finishes. This is your prompt to act. But first of a smile on your face. Do the prompt. Do this prompt will make you do the habit you need to do.
Speaker 1:And remember to celebrate the habit. Remember BJ Fogg. To while you're in a habit, you must celebrate it. So please do that now. So I'm gonna stop this.
Speaker 1:Do what you need to do and celebrate. Get in. Wills is the best. Come on. And happy days.
Speaker 1:That's it. So use it as a prompt, Have a good day, and I'll speak to you all soon.
